She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
