So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
She even gives head with a lisp.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
