guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
