doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
