I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
