She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize