drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
