at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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