is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
