Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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