Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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