I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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