O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
