I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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