Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize