why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
