on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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