I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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