You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'm at about main and main street
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
