things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
