no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
