I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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