Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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