I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
