Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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