You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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