I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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