Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
