You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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