we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Randomize
