I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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