It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
