tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
