Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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