Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I made him laugh his dick is mine
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
