I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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