is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
