You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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