I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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