So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
