found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
