this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
