you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
either way he was missing a nipple.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I have aggressive nipples.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
