sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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