it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
