the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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