i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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