I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
