It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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