need another drink. this is the easiest way
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
